GO TO THE ER:
let my tell you a rather entertaining and quit anecdotal story about an appendicitis:
a long time ago in a far away place, i may have been doing a lot of MDMA one week and not eating well. i gained some intense stomach pain one evening, and immediately attributed it to my poor 'dietary' habits that week. i thought i could zen away the pain, as im rather stoical, and informed my friends i wouldnt be partying that night. i decided to get blazed and watch saving private ryan.
about towards the end of the movie, my stomach hurt so bad i thought for sure there was a golf ball sized hole in it. still attributing this to drug use (i was a kid, whatever), i simply went to the bathroom thinking that pukign would relieve me. i gagged myself and with each heave, it felt like someone was stabbing my stomach.
again, i can ignore damn near any pain, so i toughed it up and poped some downers and went to bed. i woke up, and instantly it felt like a sovel was diggingi n my stomach. i continued to ignore this for the entire day, walking like an old man and just telling my friends "im cool im cool ill sleep it off." everyone implored me to go to the hospital but i had to be a tough guy.
that evening i spent 95% of the time writhing in the fetal position at the intense pain in my stomach. it felt like a knife was just revolving around in circles, slashing up every parto f my guts. to this day ive not known such pain, and im the sort to make annual visits to the ER. it got to the point that i became completely delerious, was hallucinating everything i saw, and had absolutely no idea who i was, where i was, or what my body even felt like. some friends told me that if i wasnt physically able to meet up at a place to eat and hang out, they were forcing me to go to the hospital. funny how even in that mindstate, i refused treatment.
sure enough, i could barely walk, and they tricked me into going to see a local clinic. the lady there touched my stomach, and i bounced up off the table and writhed on the floor in agony. she said i needed immediate surgery and called an ambulance. i was a total wackjob in the ambulance, i remember seeing these dudes from the civil war with old school muskets talking about how they were going panning for gold in Tennessee. i have no memory of any such ambulance.
the following is relayed to me by my dad and 2 of my friends: i was in the ER going into shock. i freaked out from being in shock and started throwing pillows at my dad and screaming "get me out of this place." a nurse walked up to me and shot me up with like 5cc of morphene, and my dad was telling me i kept talking about how damn good it felt to be shot up for once (ive still never IVed on my own).
so then i was wheeled into the anesthesiologist, and he asked me if i did heroin or crack and i laughed and was all like no dood. so then he asked if i smoked cannabis, and i said not for a while, man. he said, how long is a while? and i said, not since my stomach started hurting real bad. he then gave me a lecture on why i shouldnt smoke so much weed that i consider a while 2 days.
i remember seeing an old lady walking a dog, sideways, on the hallway as i went into surgery. as i was being strapped down for anesthesia, i recall seeing all these dudes that i thought were the illuminati staring at me, and i got this weird premonition they were worrying about money of some sort. i then recall having a vision of a bunch of very unattractive nurses give me a sponge bath, and myself being paralyzed unable to ask them to stop. this was all apparently happening while the anestheseologist was baffled at the dose he had to give me (tolerance bitch!).
when i came to, a surgeon was in front of me explaining what had happened. it was pretty much some crazy divine intervention i diddnt kill myself ignoring that pain. he told me the odds of surviving this incident because i diddnt seek treatment was like nilch. my appendix became so swollen and grew so large, it pushed my stomach inside out. in his 35 years of emergency surgery hes never seen that happen. he said if i had waited 2 more hours to arrive, it would have burst, i would ahve felt a temporary sensation of relief, likely fell asleep from it, and the poison from the appendix would kill me within 3 hours.
i was in the hospital for a week, and pretty much a cripple for 2 months from it. i have a 7 inch long, half inch wide scar on my abs from it. most appendectomy scars are like, inch long, centimeter wide. no pain killers prescribed AT ALL as theyd encourage me to rip my scar open
seriously, go to the hospital.
